Something right or something wrong? Getting messier…

Sorta had an idea of writing a post 

that is more close to 

my HEART

Perhaps,

they’re a little more than 

anyone can think of

out-of-this-world

 

 
 

I don’t know

I really don’t

Somehow, 

at the perhaps so-called 

peak of life

at a point where everyone expects

some form of 

dreams,

goals, 

achievements,

vocation,

yadda, yadda, yadda

you name it.

 

On the other side apart from academics 

we presume / assume 

Fun

Joy

Peace

Happiness

Hope

Friends

Family 

Love

and many more of 

“the.good.things”

fall in the place.

 

Or at the very least

thought so

 

 

in the very essence

of life

I can safely say

many wanted

a sense of 

Self

Stability

Freedom

perhaps,

Wealth and 

the Temporary “happiness”

and

they will be satisfied.

 

 

In my current course of life

waves of stories 

like knitting a sweater

for winter 

I’d say

everyday

these stories

are constantly changing

fluctuating

The plot

has never been

fixed

 

It has come to a point 

there’s just 

void

emptiness

it’s like a hole

a black hole 

just like the ones

in the outer space

 

 

Daily motions

this is also another thing

I go through it

the daily motions

day-by-day

week-by-week

along the way

as I repeat these routines

s.t.u.d.y

p.a.r.t. t.i.m.e. j.o.b

s.h.o.w.e.r

f.o.o.d

s.l.e.e.p

I doubt I existed

 

 

At this moment

I’m lost

clueless of

whether or not

there’s something wrong 

in myself

 

Most times,

I feel fine

capable

amazing

confident

sociable

pretty

you name any positive description 

of a girl similar to my age

I feel that

 

And here comes

the hurricane

that hits

no matter

rain or sunshine

 

 

Tomorrow

is another of Pdoc’s appointment

As I try my very best to find out

if anything is going on

or whateva is going on

 

I sincerely hope

whatever choice I make

will be the right one. 

 

Drowsily and tiredly

Signing off

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